Being involved in a relationship that you think is going well, and finding out that it is not going as you planned, can be very hurtful. However, this happens from time to time. There are plenty of relationships out there that result in reasons why men pull away. It can be hard to determine why this has happened and it can be stressful. But, when you know some of the reasons this happens you may be able to avoid it. Being proactive can be the best solution if you want the relationship to work.
How is Your Chemistry…
Many times you will find that the man is pulling away because it is a chemistry thing. He is not really that into you. You might think that things are wonderful and you are both getting along wonderfully but he may not think so. There are times when it will be easier for him to simply stop answering your calls rather than be honest and tell you the truth. He may be feeling uncertain about the relationship and he does not want to hurt you. If you have been pressuring him to commit he may pull away because the of the pressure to commit to the relationship too soon.
Is He Too Busy…
You may think that he is pulling away but he may actually be too busy to return your calls. Stop and think about that for a minute. What does he do for a living? Does he seem to be on the go all of the time? If you know that he works, volunteers, goes to school, etc. then he may not be calling back because he may be genuinely too busy to respond. You should always think about what is going on in his life before you jump to conclusions. It is possible that there is a legitimate reason for his distance. You should think about these things before you freak out.
Does He Still Feel Connected…
Some men will find that they no longer feel appreciated by their partner. If you suspect that he no longer feels appreciated or respected then you have to make sure that you are doing what it takes to help him feel this way. Maybe you have been together for a really long time and you no longer sit down and speak with each other. When was the last time that you were together and actually laughed? Try this every once and awhile. Talk about your day and what you have accomplished. Try to be more understanding of each others issues and make a genuine effort to listen to his day and the events that took place.
Are There Any Changes…
These are important aspects of your relationship and if you are not doing this on a regular basis then you should take some time to reconnect. Get to know each other again. People change and if your partner has changed you may not even realize it. Communication is certainly one way to find out if he has changed. Remember change is good and necessary for growth in your relationship. Understanding what changes have occurred will help you to know your man much better and also help you to understand where you have changed also. Embrace the changes if they are good and talk about those that are not good including your own.
What About His Personal Time…
It does not matter how much you love your partner, you have to give him the chance to break away and be with his friends. Give him time to do the things that he loves. He needs personal time to himself and if you do not give it to him he will begin to pull away in order to get it. You cannot be needy and clingy if you want your relationship to work. There must be some mutual respect. You most likely enjoy doing things with your friends. He wants to be able to do the same. Healthy relationships will respect this. If not, he will get it one way or another so it is healthier to discuss it and give him his space.
Is He Having Affairs…
Yes, your man may be pulling away because he is having an affair. As previously mentioned, there are several other reasons for this behavior so you should not immediately jump to this conclusion. Review your behavior, as well as his, and explore your relationship. Do any of these other reasons make sense to you? Some signs that he may be having an affair include: changing his appearance, mood swings, emotionally distant, guilty, unexpected or unusual behavior, he is never around anymore, and the most common sign a women can have is when her gut tells her something is wrong. If any of these signs are present and are different from his normal behavior than you may have a right to believe that infidelity is occurring.
Is It Because of Money…
Are you making all of the money in the relationship? Even though a man may not admit it he wants to be the breadwinner. In fact, he is programmed to be the main source of income for the family from birth. If you are making all of the money he may be ashamed. His ego may be hurt. He may be pulling away because he is embarrassed and his pride is hurt. Communication again here is key to resolving this issue as just getting the feelings off of his chest will allow him to visualize it for himself and be able to better deal with it.
Does He Still Compliment Your Looks…
It really does not matter how long you have been with your man. He still wants you to look good. So, if you have not taken the time to make yourself up for him lately then it may be time. You may be shocked to see his response when you fix yourself up. That is not to say that you look bad all of the time but it will make you feel more attractive and he will love it. If you are going through some emotional times yourself than dressing up and looking good will make you also feel good and kill two birds with one stone so to speak. Looking good for your man can be a strong aphrodisiac and do wonders for bringing him closer to you.
Is He Being a Boy…
If your man enjoys touching base with his youth every now and then you should let him. Do not deny him the opportunity to play a video game or collect toys that he loved as a child. You may not see the need but he does and he needs to be able to do this. This could be the way he releases stress and tension like he did when he was a child. Allow him to reconnect with his childhood once in a while so he can replenish his energy and peace of mind.
Are You Nagging…
Are you always telling him what to do? This is annoying. It is not going to motivate him to do what you want so there is no reason to keep it going. Try to decrease the nagging and see if this has a positive response. You might be surprised. Couples often get complacent in their relationship and when something changes or gets side tracked they are more likely to nag to try and curb that which they deem inappropriate. This is not healthy for either of you so try to find the positives in the things he is doing that may irritate you or try a different approach in how you talk about them instead of nagging him.
To sum it up…
You have seen that there are a number of different reasons why men pull away. It does not always mean that he is having an affair, or the relationship is over. Consider talking to your man and find out what he is thinking. You may discover a problem that you did not even know existed. You may also find that the problem can easily be fixed if you just put in some effort. Avoiding the problem and jumping to conclusions will not make anything better so make the time to talk about it if you can.
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